Sometimes as I start my days, and give praise to God for this day He has made, my mind rewinds to a memory of a special event with family and as I replay it, there are often times I can’t pinpoint exactly when it occurred, but have a particular time frame in which I think it might have happened, so I’m off on a search to check my quiet time pages for those months when I think it may have been to see if I recorded that special day on paper.
Then there are days when I just have to get outside and see the beauty of God’s creation, and enjoy the quietness and stillness of the morning as I search His Word, and just sit and listen as He takes me on a journey through memories and words of truth from scripture that are hidden in my heart.
Today it was all of the above. As I paged through a journal from February of last year, I reflected on those days when tears came often as I struggled to accept my life without my love beside me. In some ways, it seems like an eternity ago, yet the memory of those last days, that last week and month that we shared together, prayed and waited for God to unfold his plan for us in St. Augustine are fresh in my heart.
This has been especially brought to mind as I listen to Pastor Bryan’s messages in our “marriage relationship series” and he shares in the theme “Fight Night” and putting the “gloves on.” As I reflect upon our marriage, I recall those times when we each wanted our own way, gave one another the silent treatment or said words that were from a hurting place, but also remember how God worked in us and through us, challenged our hearts and brought us to the realization of our love for one another, that He had made us “one” and allowed us to share words of love and forgiveness. Years ago, I was told that the most important 11 words in a marriage are… I love you, I was wrong, I'm sorry, please forgive me.
I’m reminded of the commitment that my love, Bill and I made on our wedding day, vowing to walk together and had promised to love, until death parted us. In a prayer that we shared with our family and friends, we spoke of the endless joy as well as the hardships and disappointments we knew would come on that road before us and that much that was ahead was uncertain, but the one thing that was sure, “Faith, hope, love abide, these three, but the greatest of these is love.” It was not until the next year, when God in His marvelous plan for us, took us to a remote island in Alaska, where we realized our need for a Savior and truly understood how He would grant us Grace and He would diligently work all things for our good and His Glory The words that we had shared on our wedding day took on new meaning, as we prayed that He would temper our hearts with kindness and understanding and get rid of pretense and jealousy, and walk beside us, through all our life together.
This Saturday will mark one year ago that our family gathered at the Jacksonville Military Cemetery and shared our thoughts and said an earthly farewell to our loved one. His spirit was led safely home. On January 4, 2018, not even contemplating that the next twelve hours would be his final hours on earth, I had whispered to him, “Jesus is holding you tight,” and Billy had softly spoken to me, “and He is holding you tight too.” Our loved one’s mission on earth was finished early the next morning, January 5, 2018.
Our days are numbered, each is a gift! As I reflect on that, the words of a poem from my school days play out…”For I have promises to keep, and miles to go before I sleep, miles to go before I sleep.” Stopping by Woods on a Snowy Evening, by Robert Frost.
Thank you, Lord for your Word today, for the knowledge that earthly trials are only for a season (temporary). Through them, you refine our faith. True faith is that which cannot be destroyed, it is tried with fire. We have been redeemed by His blood, and “can stand fast in the liberty, wherewith Christ hath made us free and are not to be entangled with the yoke of bondage.” (Galatians 5:1).
I think of the words in Matthew, chapter 16, when Jesus asked Peter, “But whom say ye that I am?” And then told him, “And I say also unto thee, That thou art Peter, and upon this rock I will build my church; and the gates of hell shall not prevail against it.” And for the truths of Mark 4:25…”if a house is divided against itself, that house will not be able to stand.”
I'm so thankful for the gift of memory, how God uses our past and present, and future Grace with that blessed hope and the promise of Victory in Jesus!
What an encouragement it is for me to be a part of our church REVERB, as we together are challenged always to love and share with others that they may be brought from darkness into God’s glorious kingdom of light.
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